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Writer's pictureHenry Cavanaugh

Not Your Husband


“Sorry lady, I have no idea what you’re talking about. Your husband? Lady, I’m gay. Like I’d ever let a girl touch my junk. I’m all about sucking cock and having twinks bouncing on mine.”

“No, there’s nothing wrong with me. I’m just telling you I’m not your boyfriend and I never have been. What’s so difficult to understand about that?”

“Okay, you’re just fucking with me now, right? I’m not some bank manager and I never have been. Why the fuck would I do something boring like that when I’m not even that good at math, huh? You must have me confused with somebody else.”

“No, my name is Jaden Sacks. Who the fuck is John Swill? He sounds like an asshole. I’m twenty-six, not thirty-nine and I’ve never been married in my life. Why is that so hard to accept?”

“Okay ma’am, you’re really going to have to leave now. Stop screaming, you’re scaring our paying members. This is really bad for our business. This is a men-only gym, it says it right there on the door. Come back when you have a dick and a working brain, okay? Now get the hell out of here before I have to call the cops!”

Oh Jaden, if only you knew everything that woman just told you was right. You really did used to be John Swill, a bank manager nearing his forties who signed up to my gym when you started going through a mid-life crisis. Now you have that hot body you were looking far and a second chance at your youth but it comes at a price, of course! I don’t let straight guys work for me and you’re far too pretty now to believe you belong to anybody other than me.


Now why don’t you step into my office and show me those gains you’re so proud of, hmm? I can tell you’re pretty shaken up after that crazy lady harassed you earlier… why don’t I give you something to take your mind off of it? Wouldn’t you like that?


There’s a good boy.

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